Hey kid, why the long face
Is it cuz santa clause is flying right over your place
Youve been a bad kid all year
So quit you snivellin sucker now and mop up them tears
You dont deserve a damn thing
Youre not even cute and your attitude stinks
It must suck to be you
Nobody likes you so what can you do
You think you got problems kid, you think you got strife
But come each december do you fear for your life
Oh well, Im your turkey, baby, so your troubles are small
Now Im stuffed on your table, Im a tasty butterball
Cuz Ive got the christmas turkey blues
If you got your necked ripped out then youd have them too
Cuz Ive got the christmas turkey blues
You chase me and waste and baste me and taste me and drown me in gravy too
Lets take a walk! gobble, gobble baby!
You sir, you look like heck
Didnt you get your christmas bonus cheque
Or maybe your woman left you
Ripped your heart right out of your chest and spat on it too
Is that why youre reeking of gin
You look disheveled and theres drool on your chin
You thought that this love would last
But she said, merry christmas, baby and she booted your ass
Well thats tough for you mister, too bad about your ordeal
How about getting stuffed in the wintertime, see how you feel
I dont get to yank no bones or make me a wish
It wont be long til Im just some scraps on your dish
Cuz Ive got the christmas turkey blues
If your butt was stuffed and roasted then youd have then too
Ive got the christmas turkey blues
You chase me and waste and baste me and taste me and drown me in gravy too
Cuz Ive got the christmas turkey blues
Oh, you know what its like having the christmas turkey blues, baby?
I tell you -- hey, what are you doing with that axe?
Oh no, oh no, oh no, baby, no!
Well, now that Im here on your plate, what do you want?
You want some white meat or some dark meat, leg, breast, or thigh?
Hey, you ought to see my giblet you know
Oh, oh, oh!
Cuz Ive got the christmas turkey blues
Wouldnt you just rather have some ham, or how about some chicken...
